Here is a list of the things I should’ve said during my commutes. If there is a real life thought bubble, these would totally pop up from my head!
- Miss, I am not a pillow. Please do not sleep on my shoulders.
- Dude, my arm isn’t an arm rest! Keep yours to yourself!
- (Sitting at the back) Hey, guurrrl, there is a five-finger space over there, can you move a little? Your skin next to mine in this summer heat is really uncomfortable.
- Wow, man, your music taste is impeccable! I can hear it blasting out of your earphones. I wonder if you are going deaf…because you are shouting at the driver while paying for the fare!
- I know, I know, sometimes you can’t help making phone calls, but I am so not included in your conversation, nor do the other passengers, so why are we hearing every bit of detail that you are telling your girlfriend?
- Hey, missy, we both paid the same fare price, so please do not hog the air conditioning vent. I set it to the middle so that I can also share it with you, so stop touching it! I will so win this tug-o-war!
- Mister, your behind is too wide to sit here in the middle. I know four can occupy the space, but you occupy two. So please sit at the back!
- You smell like an ashtray and that cologne you used to hide it, just made it worse! Brushing your teeth would be awesome for you, too.
- I know, I am gifted, but please stop undressing me with your eyes, you perv! There is a reason why I am wearing a loose fitting top!
- Mr. FX Driver, please be fair and ask for the correct fare.
So there. I think I’ve summed up the top 10 things I should’ve said, there’s more, actually, but these are the most common.
Some items on the list was contributed by a friend who does tutorials about makeup, go read her blog for more tips and tricks on beautifying yourself!